It’s a painful road, motherhood. A constant cross of desire
to be more, have more, and perfect contentment varying day by day sometimes by
the second.
You see, sometimes I know you get so lost in motherhood and bettering your lives and every aching thought is about your children. Why? We wish we knew. We wish we knew what made us as mothers crave their arms around the back of our necks when we feel lost or alone. We wish we knew why when we looked at them we saw
pieces of ourselves that we wanted to make sure were never broken again.
We get so lost sometimes that it takes us from reality.
You
see when I pray at night, I pray to God that when I close my eyes that he protects
my babies while I rest, only to spend the next day yelling at them for things
they can’t control, or accidents, or even sometimes because admittedly I just
need to yell and they are so willing to cause chaos.
We forget about us. We forget about our husbands. We sometimes
forget about the sanctity that makes our family whole, and that is our
marriage. It sometimes seems so unselfishly selfish that we want nothing but the
world for our babies, and thinking that we are the world to them. But the reality
is, they are our every breath, our every heartbeat, our every second of
adrenaline. THEY are what keeps us moving in this life – but we must never
forget the man who made us a Mother. The man who gave us the dream of nurturing
innocent little babies and yelling at their mischief.
So tonight, I will remember to pray for my husband – and to
pray for his heart, his soul, his well-being and to also pray for him as a
father. It’s so easy to get lost in motherhood, and maybe I’ll remember to pray
for me too. To be a less yell-y mama, to pray for my heart and my soul and my
well-being (AKA Sanity, which moms don’t have)
So tonight when you’re saying your baby lovin’ prayers (even
if they’re 32 year old babies) remember to pray for your family and what made
you a family. Your husband, the father of your children, and you too..
